Friendship

I've been thinking a lot about friendship recently. It seems like some people just click with others right away and go through their lives surrounded by good friends, always having someone to spend time and have fun with.

Then there are people like me. Yes, I do have some amazing friends but my best friend in the whole world is in Scotland studying and the other friends I have are never around much. I can’t blame them, they have their own lives and things to do.

I don’t make friends easily and I envy people who do. Someone I love deeply pointed out to me that at a certain age, we never really make new friends. All we have are the ones we made as kids and teenagers and eventually, life pulls most friendships apart.

It’s a sad thought that we all end up going our own way and losing contact. Even with things like Facebook and Twitter, a comment or a like is never the same as just hanging out and having a laugh with a friend.

I know I’m not on my own in this. There are plenty of people who feel the same way and it’s sad to think there can be so much loneliness in a world with so many people. Even when you feel so alone, remember that someone else out there feels the exact same way.

All any of us can do is make the best of what we have and be a good person. I believe great friendships are like love, they can appear out of nowhere and you feel that you've known that person forever. We all have to grow up and just try our best to not grow apart. The friends we all have are the ones who've seen us at our best and worst and have supported us despite everything. I believe if you’re a good person and try your best, then you find people who will be there for you. All you have to do is be open to possibility and hold on to what you have.

We all make mistakes in life. This week I almost lost the person I love most in the world because of my own stupidity. But we’re all human beings, we all have faults. Love is the best type of friendship that exists because you grow together and if you’re very lucky, you never grow apart. 

CXLVII

Sunlight yawned over rooftops and pierced the hotel room window.

Shining on your face as you lay back in my arms

Turning it golden

And I remember thinking in that early morning with the day stretched before us

That your face now illuminated my world

And made all things brighter.

Your eyelashes fluttered as I ran one finger over your chest

You struggle between sleep and the wakefulness of my soft touch.

Eyes opened,

You smiled and said the words

“It’s too bright”

I kissed you, shielding your eyes from the sun

While warming my fingers on your face that radiated hope and joy.

Your eyes crinkled and I lay there watching you

Creating stories in my head, writing you enough poems to last a life time.

Wondering if you’d ever wish to read them.

Those days were filled with points and scores,

Nobody wanted to miss, they all craved winning a trophy

And I sat there smiling, slightly numb until you placed your hand on my leg and squeezed.

And I melted.

I knew I couldn’t miss… I had to win…

The trophy I wanted was too precious and rare.

I had to have you and not just for a few stolen nights in a city we both had never seen before.

At night we searched the sky for UFO’s and laughed.

And even in the dark, with your hands on my body

And your lips kissing mine

There was no blackness any longer,

Just light…

I would kiss your shoulder and sigh as shooting stars and sunbeams tickled my mind

And changed my world forever

As it collided with yours

Part of me is still there in that city, in that hotel, in that room, in that bed.

At night when I can’t sleep, I close my eyes and go back there...

You beside me.

Strong arms curling around me.

You take me away with you.

Whisper things only I understand and we kiss.

Curtains close and we are surrounded by darkness…

Then your hands find me in the blackness, you pull me to you

Rainbows glow around us, newly polished with love

And there is only light.